Our Dear Kappa
by zephyrdjinn
Summary: Soon after marriage, fate smiles upon the golden pair. They adopt a child! How will they fair as parents? And, why does Fuji already seem to dislike their new baby? [Future-fic, slice of life, crack] Golden Pair and Perfect Pair
1. Prologue: Baby Kappa

**Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis and its characters belongs to Konomi Takeshi**

~O~O~O~O~

Soon after they were married fate stumbled upon the golden pair. Oishi was on his way home from work. He was riding his bike, because it was eco-friendly, also as a newly married man he was poor. The bike path cut right through a park in the center of town with large lake. It was the kind of place where parents would bring their kids to play and feed the little white geese in the afternoons. _Maybe, Eiji and I will bring our future children here one day._ Oishi mused. _Eiji would love to play with the geese. Ah, but I have to remind him not to feed them any bread. Actually, feeding them bread is bad for their health and makes them quite aggressive._

The park was eerily quiet at night. Only the sound of Oishi's tires squeaking along the pavement could be heard.

That and the faint sound of a child laughing

 _Hehehe_

Oishi abruptly brought his bicycle to a halt and looked around in confusion. There was no one around; it must have just been his imagination. Sighing to himself, he started to peddle along the beaten path again.

 _Hehehe_

"That sound again. Now I'm sure of it." Oishi whispered softly. Looking around the park again, Oishi's eyes came into contact with the small body of a child floating in the water, maybe 1 or 2 years old. With all his might Oishi rushed over to the small child, scooping it out of the water.

 _Hehehe_

What kind of demonic person would abandon their child in the middle of a lake? Why not at least go to the police station!? The child looked unharmed. Content even, as it kept giggling in delight. But, Oishi being Oishi decided it was best for the child to be inspected by a doctor.

Oishi sent a quick text to Eiji, informing him that he would be home a little later that night. Setting the child in the basket of his bike, Oishi sped of for the nearest hospital.

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After taking the child to the doctor for a check-up an utterly exhausted Oishi finally arrived home to his shared apartment with Eiji. It wasn't the nicest apartment, but it allowed animals, which had been a deal breaker for Eiji. Opening the door of the apartment, Oishi was greeted by the barks of their spunky small dog, Beam.

"Shh…Beam…be quiet. You're going to wake up Eiji." Oishi scolded. Beam was named after Eiji's signature move 'Kikumaru Beam' because of her seemingly endless bouts of energy.

"Shuichiro! You're back! I was starting to worry!" Eiji exclaimed from the living room.

"Eiji! You didn't have to wait up for me…It's nearly 2:00am." Oishi replied in surprise. Although he really shouldn't have been surprised, Eiji always waited up for him no matter how late his job kept him.

"I know. I know." Eiji smiled. Noticing the little bundle in Oishi's arms Eiji asked, "Shuichiro, Whacha got there?"

"This" Oishi said, turning the child around to face Eiji， "is the reason I'm late coming home tonight. I found him abandoned in the lake, and I rushed him to the hospital just in case. The doctor says he's perfectly healthy, but….because there's no record of his family he's going to have to go into the foster system unless someone adopts him."

"That's awful!" Eiji gasped.

"I'm going to call social services tomorrow when their offices are open. Until then he's staying over here." Oishi finished explaining with a deep sadness in his eyes.

Seeing the look in his partners eyes Eiji offered a solution. "Wait! Shuichiro, why don't we adopt him?"

"What? Are you being serious, Eiji?" Oishi said, taken aback. They were a freshly married couple with little income. They barely had enough to buy Beam's food every month, much less support a child.

"Yeah, I mean, you and I both want kids eventually. Why not get started early? Besides, don't you think this is a little bit like fate?" Eiji asked whimsically

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Fuji was at work. Working for a giant corporate photography company. It was very mundane, most of the day was spent answering the phone or answering e-mails, not taking actual photographs. Originally, he planned to open his own studio, where he could work on his own hours, and take photos of things he liked. But, realistically he needed experience first.

The phone rang. Probably another parent wanting a portrait of their annoying bratty child.

"Atobe Photos Incorporated, Fuji Syusuke speaking"

 _Oh yeah, he also worked for Atobe_

"Fuji! I have some exciting news!" Eiji yelled over the phone.

"mmhmm, I'm listening" Fuji replied from the other line. Although he technically wasn't supposed to take personal calls, he sometimes bent the rules for Eiji. Eiji usually did most of the talking in their conversations, so no one was suspicious.

"Fuji! Shuichiro and I are parents! Parents Fuji! Like real adults!" Eiji beamed in elation on the other end of the line.

For a moment Fuji's eyes shot open in shock, luckily they were talking on the phone and Eiji was unable to see it. "What? Come again?" Fuji asked calmly.

"I said I'm a dad! Yesterday, Shuichiro found this baby abandoned in the park and long story short we adopted him. I wanted you to be the first to know! Well… the first to know after my parents, my grandparents, Shuichiro's parents, my older sister, second oldest sister, older brother, and second oldest brother. Oh yeah, and Shuichiro's little sister!" Eiji babbled.

Really, Eiji should have just said 'I wanted you to be the first non-family member to know.' It would have been a lot shorter. "Eiji, do you have all the supplies to take care of it? It's a lot of work to take care of those, you know."

"Take care of _him_ , Fuji. Not it. And, yeah, Shuichiro's really good at that kind of thing! Plus my oldest sister and oldest brother already have children, so I have plenty of practice with taking care of kids. By the way, do you want to come over and meet him?" Eiji asked

"Sure, why not. I get off work this afternoon around 5:30, I'll come by then."

"Okay, great. Why don't you bring Tezuka too, it will be great practice for you guys." Kikumaru teased. Ever since his friend officially started dating the former Seigaku captain, Kikumaru always seemed to find a way bring their relationship up in conversation.

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Tezuka and Fuji had just begun dating approximately 3 months ago; around the same time Tezuka had announced his retirement from Pro Tennis. Naturally, they had both harbored feelings for the other much longer than that, and the bond between them was much deeper than 3 months. During his time as a pro, Tezuka had made a decision not to become involved in a serious relationship, so he could focus all of his energy on Tennis. And, both of them also knew the chances a long distance relationship would work out. (20% according to Inui) Tezuka was worried Fuji would resent him for choosing to play serious tennis for so many years and keeping their relationship strictly on a friendship level (when it was obvious they both wanted more). He was pleasantly surprised upon his arrival back into Japan when Fuji nonchalantly asked him if he would 'like to go out sometime'

Upon arriving at the Kikumaru-Oishi home, Fuji and Tezuka were greeted by Beam's annoying yapping.

"Fuji, Tezuka, welcome to our home!" Oishi greeted, trying to shush the little rascal.

"Oishi, thank you for inviting us." Tezuka stoically replied.

"GUYS, HURRY AND COME MEET OUR SON" Eiji yelled from the kitchen, which was just a few feet away, because it was a very small apartment.

"Eiji, no need to yell." Oishi laughed as everyone squeezed into the tiny apartment kitchen.

"Guys, I want you to meet Kaito, our son." Eiji grinned, holding the young boy up for all to see. Kaito's thick black hair was cut into a strange bowl cut, with a noticeable bald spot on the top of the head. His skin had an inhuman greenish tinge to it. [1]

"Kappa." Fuji's eyebrows twitched. [2]

"No, Fuji, Kaito, not Kappa." Eiji corrected. Fuji was so strange sometimes.

"Why did you bring a kappa into your home?!" Fuji demanded.

"Why did you name it Kaito? I thought you found it in a lake." Tezuka asked out of the blue.

" _Him_ Tezuka, not it. And, ocean, lake same thing! Besides, I like the name Kaito. " Eiji retorted.

 _I see. Oishi let Eiji choose the name. Typical. Well at least he didn't name it Omelet or Oishi jr._ "So, did you give the kappa your last name or Oishi's?" Fuji asked, curious.

"Both! We combined them into one super name! Oishimaru Kaito!" Eiji said proudly. He had probably thought of that part himself too. Oishi most likely liked the idea, because it was 'fair.' Don't they know everyone's going to just end up calling the kid Oishi?

"Nice to meet you, Oishimaru." Tezuka greeted the baby.

"Tezuka, I don't think there's really any need for you to call the kappa by its surname."

"Aren't you being a little hypocritical Fuji? You just called Tezuka by his last name! And, you're dating him! I still can't believe you guys aren't on a first name basis yet!" Eiji sighed in exasperation.

"Eiji…." Oishi said in a warning tone. Eiji was always poking his nose where it didn't belong.

Suddenly Kaito started crying.

"I think he's hungry. We've been trying to feed him, but he's really picky. He barely touches his food." Oishi explained.

 _A Kappa's favorite food is the flesh of human children. That and… "_ Have you tried cucumbers?" Fuji inquired.

~O~O~O

[1] 'kai' [海] in kaito means ocean

[2] If you don't know what a kappa is I think you can find an explanation on the Internet better than I can give. Basically, kappa are Japanese mythological river demon that are blamed for drownings in rivers and lakes. There are many stories involving the kappa, such as that they are tricky, have a hairless flat spot on their head that must always be kept wet (or else they will die), and that they love cucumbers.

[3] For clarity purposes, I didn't want to change Oishi and Kikumaru's last names after they were married. But actually, I read that in Japan by law one spouse must adopt the name of the other spouse. Very intense O.O


	2. Impolite Kappa?

**Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis and its characters belongs to Konomi Takeshi**

~O~O~O~O~

 _2 years later_

Finally Fuji Syusuke was free from the enslavement of working for 'Atobe Photos Incorporated.' He now sat at the manager's desk of the small 12 man photography company, 'Cactus Photos Incorporated', he started up just under 6 months ago. Fuji wasn't really the manager type, but he liked being able to set his own hours, photograph the things he liked, and he secretly also enjoyed messing around with his underlings…erm… employees. _Oh you want a raise? First enjoy some of this delicious (and mysterious) green juice I got from a former teammate of mine….fufufu_

Looking at his desk calendar, he remembered today was the day he promised to babysit Eiji and Oishi's son, Kaito. The boy had bothered Fuji ever since Oishi and Eiji had welcomed him into their homes. To start off his skin was _green_. Moreover, the boy never seemed to grow any hair on the top of his head. It was just bald and always seemed to be kind of wet.

 _Yup, Kaito definitely isn't human. He's a kappa for sure._ Fuji thought. _How could Oishi have been so stupid as to bring this creature into his home?_ But, as much as Fuji disliked the tiny terror, he had to admit Oishi and Eiji needed some time to themselves every once and a while.

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

At Seigaku, the new tennis coach, Tezuka Kunimitsu was busy filing some paper's for the upcoming Kanto tournament. When Ryuzaki decided to retire as the head coach of the tennis club, Tezuka had applied for the job without hesitation. Who knew behind the cold, stoic demeanor lay such a sentimental guy?!

Picking up the phone, Fuji dialed his boyfriend's number.

"Kunimitsu, the kappa is coming over today, we should prepare some cucumbers. Would you mind going to the store?" Fuji asked sweetly.

"Syusuke, for the last time, he is not a kappa! He is Oishi and Kikumaru's child, at least pretend to like him." Tezuka replied.

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

Most days Tezuka returned home from work earlier than Fuji. Although there was not 1% of him that believed Oishimaru to be a kappa, he had gone to the store to buy some cucumbers anyway. The child did seem to enjoy those.

Looking around, Tezuka noticed he and Fuji lived in one of the most non-childproof homes ever. It was mostly [all] Fuji's fault. By now he had collected at least 50 cacti and the collection was still growing. Cacti in the living room, the bedroom, the guest bedroom, the entryway, the kitchen... Fuji had carefully instructed Tezuka not to move them, because they might get 'disoriented' and 'stressed.' Tezuka didn't listen to his boyfriend's silly excuses and quickly moved all 50 of the cacti into their shared bedroom. He then wrote a small sign that read: "Hazardous, Please Do Not Enter" and taped it on the bedroom door.

Fuji returned to find his home completely barren! His precious babies were gone!

"Kunimitsu! What happened? What did you do with them?!" Fuji asked suspiciously.

"Calm down. I just placed your cacti in the bedroom." Tezuka answered.

"The bedroom?!" Fuji exclaimed, running over to their bedroom door he saw the sign. "Hey, what exactly do you mean by 'Hazardous?' My babies aren't 'Hazardous!'"

"Ah...I was worried that Oishimaru would damage your cacti." _Or maybe that your cacti would hurt Oishimaru_

"I see...good point." Fuji reflected. "I guess we should get started on dinner before the kappa brat makes his way over here."

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It was a fact that neither Tezuka nor Fuji enjoyed cooking or were very good at it. Therefore, Tezuka had devised a very simple method to decide who would cook dinner each night. One of them would spin a tennis racquet on its head, and if it landed on "rough" it was Fuji's night, if it landed on "smooth" it was Tezuka's night. (very similar to deciding who would serve in a tennis match). Tezuka had bought a special 'deciding who would cook dinner tonight' tennis racquet just for this very purpose. He didn't want to disrespect his real tennis racquet.

Tezuka and Fuji watched intensely as the racquet spun around vertically on the kitchen tiles.

"Rough" Tezuka announced triumphantly.

That meant it was Fuji's night to cook dinner. The tomatoes he was growing from seeds Yukimura had given him had finally ripened, perfect for making a tomato soup. He wasn't a professional chef like Eiji, but he could make something simple like tomato soup. Right?

Just as Fuji was finishing up dinner, the doorbell rang. From the kitchen, Fuji overheard Tezuka letting the little monster demon child in to their home and Oishi profusely thanking Tezuka for taking care of 'his little angel.'

Fuji quietly set the table as he waited for his boyfriend and the kid kappa to arrive. His food might not be the best quality, but the one and only good thing about a kappa is that they are very polite.

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

"Bleh…this isn't ANYTHING like Daddy's food. This food sucks." Kaito spit the tomato soup out on the table.

 _What? Kappa are supposed to be polite! Kappa are supposed to be polite!_ Fuji thought in confusion.

"Eat your food, Oishimaru." Tezuka glared. That child had been spoiled rotten by Kikumaru's cooking.

"Is this even organic? My Dad says I can only eat organic." Kaito brattily informed. It was no secret that Oishi was an environmentalist health nut.

"I grew the tomatoes myself." Fuji gestured to the potted tomato plant in the corner of the living room.

"You must have done something wrong then, because this tastes like poop." Kaito snickered, giving Fuji a thumbs down.

If Fuji were Inui he might be thinking something like ' _this goes completely against my data'_ Because, although kappa are mischievous troublemakers, they are also polite to a fault [1]. The boy wasn't a kappa! He was _worse_ than a kappa.

Tezuka knew that Fuji was secretly sensitive about his culinary skills...or lack there of. It wasn't that his boyfriend was awful at cooking or anything, he just didn't excel at it like Kikumaru. Tezuka watched Fuji hide his emotions behind a carefully crafted smile, but he could still tell Kaito's words had stung.

"Apologize, this instant." Tezuka demanded.

"Or what?" Kaito answered defiantly.

"You'll have to run laps."

"You can't do that. I'll tell my dads!"

"Apologize or 50 laps around the house."

"Fine, I'm sorry or whatever." Kaito rolled his eyes.

"30 laps for eye rolling"

Reluctantly, the kid made his way outside to begin running laps around the house.

"Kunimitsu…Oishi's going to be mad when he finds out you made his baby boy run laps" Fuji spoke up, trying not to show his amusement at Tezuka's choice of punishment.

"I'm sure Oishi will understand when we explain to him the situation. Oishimaru will be entering grade school soon. He needs to improve his behavior before then." Tezuka stated.

"Hmm…Kunimitsu you're right!" Fuji happily agreed, but Tezuka sensed a hint of something mischievous behind the tone of voice. "But, I don't think Oishi will believe his perfect little angel of a boy has done anything wrong just from us saying so."

Tezuka sighed heavily knowing his boyfriend had some sort of scheme in mind. "What do you have planned, exactly?" He asked reluctantly.

"Let's record him!" Fuji suggested.

"Do you think he will still act up while being recorded?" Tezuka asked.

"No, Kunimistu, in secret! He's always so rude to me (as of today), so I'll play a game with him. Then when he starts saying something out of line, record it with your phone." Fuji explained.

"Isn't it illegal to record someone without their permission?" Tezuka asked.

"Technically, it's not illegal if one of the parties is aware they are being recorded. Besides, parents record their children all the time without permission, so I don't think it's a big deal. Just pretend like your texting on your phone and record us when something happens."

Fuji then remembered Tezuka hardly ever used his phone, except to answer calls from others. He was probably just now discovering there was a recording option on the phone.

"You know how to use the recording option on the phone right?"

"Yes…" Tezuka said, slightly unsure of himself

Fuji quickly showed Tezuka how to use the recording option on the phone before Kaito returned.

"I…finished…all…30…laps." Kaito wheezed from the front door.

"Do you want to play a game now?" Fuji asked innocently

"Yes! A game! Do you have any video games?" Kaito pleaded, suddenly bursting with energy.

"Your father doesn't like you playing those, remember Oishimaru?" Tezuka reminded. Oishi was one of _those_ parents.

"But, sometimes when dad goes to work, daddy and I play them together!" Kaito argued. Tezuka wondered how Oishi would feel about Kikumaru secretly playing video games with Oishimaru while he was at work.

"Well, we don't own any video games. How about another game…like…" Fuji remembered that they didn't own any games suitable for a 3 year old. He probably had some poker cards in their room, but 3 year olds weren't interested in that. And, the only game Tezuka ever wanted to play was…

"Tennis." Tezuka interjected.

"Noooo! I HATE tennis! I wanna go swimming! Do you have a pool?" Kaito whined.

"You just ran 30 laps around the house. Did you see a pool?" Tezuka was slightly annoyed he didn't catch the kid saying he hated tennis on camera. His parents needed to know how disrespectful their son was. Tezuka decided to turn on the voice record option on for the rest of the time, just in case something unexpected came up.

"Oh right! Didn't Oishi and Eiji bring some of Kaito's toys when he came over?" Fuji asked, usually Oishi went all supermom and packed a little backpack of random things for Kaito 'just in case'

"My backpack!" Kaito exclaimed, jumping up to grab his backpack from where he left it by the front door.

Upon returning, Kaito fervently dumped out the contents of his backpack all over the nice white living room carpet. The backpack and its contents were all very green. A green toothbrush, green towel, green change of clothes, green organic cucumber snacks, green ninja turtle dolls…

 _This is exactly why I'm never having kids_ Fuji silently contemplated as he watched his nice clean carpet be destroyed by the filth of Kaito's backpack.

"Here, I found it! My ninja turtle dolls!" Kaito shouted at the top of his lungs, clutching 4 green turtles, a brown rat, and a guy dressed all in metal.

Was it weird that Fuji thought Kaito looked strikingly similar to the ninja turtles he was holding in his hand?

"Uncle Tezuka, which one do you want?" Kaito gestured to the four ninja turtle dolls spread out on the floor.

Tezuka had never heard of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but he did like the color blue. "The blue one"

"Uncle Tezuka, you dummy! His name is Leonardo. Uncle Fuji, you can have Donatello. And, I'll be THE SHREDDER!" Kaito screamed.

"Kaito, please apologize to Tezuka for calling him a dummy. We do not call others 'dummies' in this house." Fuji sighed in defeat, grabbing the purple ninja turtle. He wasn't good at this.

"Umm…sorry? Anyway, I'm the shredder and I'm going to kick the ninja turtle's booties!" Kaito declared.

"But, the ninja turtles are the heroes and heroes always win, right?" Fuji questioned.

"Not when I'm the Shredder." Kaito laughed maniacally. Bringing his voice down to a low dark tone Kaito whispered, "When I'm the Shredder the turtles die. Blood spills everywhere. You will die Uncle Fuji."

。。。。。。。。。。。

The next day Oishi and Kikumaru came by to pick up their child.

"Kaito, did you have a nice time?" Kikumaru asked his son

"Yes!" Kaito shouted enthusiastically.

"Now, what do we say?" Oishi reminded.

"Thank you very much Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji for having me over at your house. I had a great time." Kaito smiled innocently. He had transformed into a completely different person in front of his parents!

Just as the Oishi-Kikumaru household was about to leave, Tezuka put a hand on Oishi's shoulder.

"Wait, Oishi, can I speak with you for a moment?"

"Sure, Tezuka what is it?"

Tezuka wasn't sure how to explain the situation to his best friend. In Oishi's eyes Kaito Oishimaru was a perfect little angel of a boy. It would break his heart to learn the true nature of his son, but better sooner than later.

"Oishimaru's behavior yesterday was completely inappropriate. He said he hated—"

Overhearing the conversation Kikumaru butted in, "That's impossible, Kaito is the sweetest little guy! He would never hurt a fly. It must be some kind of misunderstanding, right Kaito?" Kikumaru asked his son.

"Of course, daddy, I didn't do anything bad. I swear." Kaito said innocently, giving Tezuka a look that said 'ha ha ha they'll _never_ believe you'.

"We have proof! Show them, Kunimitsu!" Fuji cut in, ready to prove to Oishi and Eiji the true nature of the brat.

Tezuka started playing the recording from his phone:

 _。。。_

 _'Uncle Tezuka, you dummy…'_

 _。。。_

 _'When I'm the shredder the turtles die. Blood spills everywhere. You will die Uncle Fuji'_

 _。。。_

Oishi and Kikumaru were in utter shock, never in a million years would they have guessed their 3 year old son would be capable of spouting such menacing words.

"Kaito, is this all true? Did you really say all of those mean things to your Uncle Fuji and Uncle Tezuka?" Oishi asked in a very very motherly voice.

"Dad…it was just a game…" Kaito muttered, looking sheepishly down at the ground.

Suddenly Oishi switched into his angry mode "Are you not taking this seriously? Uncle Fuji and Uncle Tezuka are your elders and you will respect them. When we get home we are going to have a very serious talk young man!" The tips of Oishi's headfangs flared up like little horns. Kaito thought he looked like an angry constipated bull.

"Yes, Dad" Kaito nodded obediently.

"He also said he hated tennis." Tezuka felt the need to add.

"Ah..umm…thank you Tezuka. We will address it when we get home." Oishi reassured. Actually, Oishi already knew his son wasn't so fond of tennis. He preferred swimming. In the Oishi-Kikumaru house it's okay to like other sports. No, really!

~O~O~O~

[1] Politeness is said to be one of the kappa's biggest downfalls. They are so polite that they sometimes stop to bow to humans, causing them to spill the water kept on the top of their heads (and if they run out of water they die). Kind of an oxymoron, the polite but menacing kappa.

Not gonna lie, I think some mean-spirited part of me just wanted Oishi and Kikumaru to have an unruly Kirihara-esque kid.

[2] The TMNT franchise does not belong to me.

[3] Oishi = 'Dad' Kikumaru = 'Daddy'


	3. Casual Engagement

**Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis and its characters belongs to Konomi Takeshi**

 _Later that night, Kikumaru called Fuji to apologize for his son's behavior._

"Fuji, I'm so sorry about the way Kaito acted. Oishi says I have to stop spoiling him so much and we're going to have to teach him better manners and stuff. It's so hard not to spoil him, though Fuji! Ah, well, you'll understand when you have kids."

 _What did Eiji mean by "when you have kids?" Who said he and Kunimitsu were ever having kids?_

"And, why haven't you guys gotten married yet? What's taking him so long to propose anyway? You two are already living together." Kikumaru added

 _Who said Kunimitsu was going to be the one proposing?_

"Ah, Eiji, don't worry to much about it. I'm just glad you two are aware of it and can properly address the situation." Lowering his voice to a barely audible whisper Fuji continued, "And…actually…I was thinking about proposing to Kunimistu…"

"THAT'S GREAT!" Kikumaru yelled triumphantly from the other line. "Doyouwantmyhelp? I can totally help you plan something super duper awesome."

Fuji quietly walked outside, where Tezuka wouldn't overhear the conversation. Not that, Tezuka was one to eavesdrop, but one could never be too careful.

"I can even ask Shuichiro for advice. He's so good at that kind of thing. It was so romantic when he proposed to me." Kikumaru then went into full detail on his engagement story, a story Fuji had heard only 50 times and knew by heart.

Kikumaru had a point, Oishi was somewhat of an expert in the romance department. But, this was Tezuka they were talking about. Candle lit dinners and romantic strolls in the park were not Tezuka's cup of tea.

"Thanks for the offer, but I've been thinking about it for a while now, and I'm just going to ask him directly." Fuji had toyed briefly with the idea of writing 'will you marry me?' on a Tennis ball, the next time he played tennis with Tezuka. But, he knew that Tezuka would scold him for 'disrespecting tennis' or something along those lines.

"That's so boring, Fuji. At least cook him his favorite meal." Kikumaru pouted on the other line.

"And by that I'm assuming you'll cook Unacha, and I can tell him I cooked it?" Fuji asked hopefully. Of course, Tezuka would never believe Fuji actually cooked it, but it was a nice gesture at least.

"Of course, it's the least I can do!" Kikumaru smiled giddily from the other line. He was maybe more excited about this than Fuji.

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As they hiked together up one of the mountain trails not too far from where they lived, Tezuka thought Fuji's behavior was slightly abnormal. Fuji had said he needed some scenic pictures for work, but he was walking rather quickly and hadn't touched his camera once. Maybe he was trying to reach the top of the mountain by sunset.

"Syusuke, is something bothering you?" Tezuka asked in concern.

"No, I'm fine." Fuji answered shortly, without a hint of distress in his voice. He slowed down his pace to match Tezuka's. He wondered how his so-called casual marriage proposal had turned into a sunset walk in the mountains.

"Watch where your stepping, there are snakes out here." Tezuka warned. Fuji's mind still seemed to be anywhere but their hike.

Before long they reached the peak of the mountain.

Fuji moved over to a large rock and busied himself by taking two small metal bento boxes out of his backpack. It was the Unacha Eiji had secretly dropped off earlier that day.

"Syusuke, the sun is beginning to set, you should take those pictures for work soon." Tezuka reminded.

Taking a seat on the rock, Fuji gestured for Tezuka to come and join him.

"Right, I will… but first let's eat some of the dinner I prepared."

Tezuka obligingly took a seat next to Fuji and opened the bento. He was delighted to find his favorite meal inside, and even more pleased to discover the taste was on point.

"Fuji, this is delicious." _I must remember to thank Kikumaru for this later_

"Mitsu…we've been seeing each other for quite some time now…" Fuji began, opening his sapphire blue eyes to look at Tezuka directly.

"Yes, a little over two years I believe." Tezuka replied, calmly meeting Fuji's gaze with his own. "And, I've been thinking…Fuji Syusuke, will you marry me?"

 _Seriously?_ Fuji thought. _Did Kunimistu really just ask me to marry him? Somehow you're always one step ahead of me, Kunimistu._

Fuji broke into a fit of laughter at the whole situation

"Stop it. I was being serious. You don't have to laugh. You can just say no." Tezuka flushed in anger.

Realizing how it must look, Fuji quickly stopped laughing. "Sorry, Kunimitsu. I promise I wasn't laughing at you. Actually, I was laughing because today I was planning….to ask you to marry me." Fuji explained.

"I had no idea…"

 _Of course he was completely oblivious._

"I worked really hard at this you know. Cooking your favorite meal, taking you to the peak of the mountain at sunset, it was all carefully planned. Then you had to swoop in and propose to ME." Fuji said in annoyance.

"You act like I haven't been working hard or planning anything at all." Tezuka stated, pulling out a small object out of his backpack. "I didn't want to propose to you until this was ready."

"Kunimitsu, it's beautiful." Fuji stared in awe.

"Ah, Syusuke, you still haven't answered my question properly." Tezuka stated stoically, without a hint of nervousness in his voice.

"Yes, Kunimitsu, of course! Let's get married!" Fuji declared, admiring the small wooden cactus Tezuka had carved for him.

 _Ah. Kunimitsu is just so romantic sometimes!_

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

Tezuka's parents were elated to learn their son would _finally_ be getting married and wouldn't be doomed to the life of a 'male spinster.' More importantly there was a chance to carry on the Tezuka family name and all of the important Tezuka family traditions. Literally days after the marriage was officiated, Tezuka's mom began pressuring the two newlyweds to adopt. ' _You two don't want to be old parents, right?'_ She would say. And she would try to guilt her son by saying things like, ' _Kunimitsu, your Grandfather would like to meet his grandson before he passes'_ Tezuka's Grandfather, one of the people Tezuka Kunimistu holds in the highest esteem, also had a hand in guilting the couple with things like, _'Sanada's Grandson and his husband already adopted a young boy several years back. They named him Sanada Yukimura, like the samurai! And what does our family have to show?'_

Being the good son that he is, Tezuka agreed to obediently follow his family's wishes, and after only 6 months of marriage he managed to convince Fuji to adopt a child with him. Fuji wasn't so keen on the idea of children, especially after their experience with Oishimaru Kaito, but agreed after seeing how obviously desperate Tezuka's parents were for a grandchild.

Tezuka's parents had expected the couple to adopt a baby boy and name it Tezuka Kuni-something, in accordance with Tezuka family tradition. When they found out their son had adopted a baby _girl_ and named her Tanja, they were slightly taken aback. Tezuka had spent over 1/3 of his life living abroad in Germany, so it wasn't out of the question for him to want to name his child a German name. But, it still felt like their son was going through a belated rebellious stage.

However, if his parents had heard what the first name choice was, they would have felt grateful, maybe even ecstatic about naming the child Tanja:

。。。

 _"Kunimitsu, since you're the only son and, according to my overbearing in-laws, we have to give the baby your last name I think it's only fair for me to pick the first name of the baby." Fuji smiled confidently._

 _"And, what exactly did you have in mind?" Tezuka asked. As long as the child learned to play tennis well, it didn't really matter to him what they named her._

 _"Kaktus. I looked it up in the dictionary; it's the German word for Cactus. I know how much you like Germany so…"_

 _"No, Kaktus won't work. Did you forget we're adopting a girl? Kaktus is a masculine noun, it's obviously more fitted for a boy's name Syusuke."_

 _If it were anyone else, they might have been mildly disturbed that Tezuka's only problem with naming his child Kaktus was that it's apparently a 'boy's name.'_

 _"Right, do you have any better ideas?" Fuji asked, mildly annoyed that he couldn't name his child 'Kaktus.' It's a good name._

 _"Actually, I was thinking we should name her Tanja, with a J, spelled the German way. It's a classic name choice." It also starts with at T, just like tennis._

 _"Hmm…not nearly as good as Kaktus, but I like it." Fuji nodded._

 _。。。_

After living in Germany for 10 years, Tezuka's opinions on what's classic or normal have become slightly distorted. While, Tezuka liked the name Tanja because it is an ordinary, classic name [which is true, in _Germany_ ], Fuji liked the name because he felt it was unique and a little tricky. Not many people in Japan would know how to pronounce Tanja. It would be fun!

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

 _Meanwhile at the Oishimaru household_

。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

"Hey, Shuichirou! Did you hear Fuji and Tezuka adopted a baby girl?" Eiji yammered through a large mouthful of food. "They named her Tan-ja, like Tangerine, I think." Eiji said, pronouncing the J the English way instead of the German way.

"Eiji, let's try to remember not speak with our mouths full…" Oishi kindly reminded. As much as he loved Eiji, sometimes it felt like he had two small children. With Kaito staying home with Eiji all day it was no wonder his manners were a little off.

Eiji quickly swallowed his food before continuing, "Right! Sorry bout' that!"

"I think they pronounce their daughter's name as 'Tanya,' it's the German pronunciation." Oishi stated.

"Why did Tezuka and Fuji have to pick such a difficult name? I've already decided I'm just going to call her Tan-chan." Eiji stated emphatically. "Anyway, Kaito, aren't you excited? Now when you go over to Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji's house you'll have a new playmate!"

。。。

。。。

。。。

"Kaito?"

The parent's looked over to find their son sneaking table scraps to their dog Beam.

"Kaito! Don't feed your green beans to Beam, it'll make her sick" Oishi scolded.

"Come'on Shuichirou! Just a little bit won't hurt. She really likes it!" Eiji grinned, giving his husband big puppy dog eyes.

Oishi gave Eiji a look of 'you're not really helping here' and decided it was time to change the subject "Eiji, I think now would be a good time to tell Kaito our good news."

"Right-O! Kaito, we're going to be getting a new member of our family! A new baby, just like Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji."

"Oh! Are you pregnant, dad?" Kaito asked, turning to look at Oishi.

"Not, quite kiddo!" Eiji laughed. "Boys can't get pregnant!"

"I thought for a second you might be pregnant, because this one time when this boy in my classes mom got pregnant her stomach got really really big. She got so fat! I thought she was gonna explode!" Kaito drew out his arms to mimic having a giant stomach

 _Did my son just call me fat? I haven't been working out as much recently. But I haven't been eating that much more, have I? Have I?_ Oishi's mind wandered in unnecessary worry.

Seeing Oishi's worried expression, Eiji decided it was time to try his hand at the 'strict parent' role. "Kaito! Apologize to Dad right now. That wasn't kind."

"But, it's true, look at Dad's head. It's so round. Just like an egg! " Kaito giggled, pointing at Oishi's egg shaped head.

Okay, now Eiji was actually kind of mad. "That's the way it's _always_ looked! Now, maybe it's best if you go to your room and think a bit until you come up with something nice to say!" Why would Kaito say something like that? Oishi's round head was one of the things everyone loved most about him！

"Wait, I remembered the other reason I thought Dad was pregnant!" Kaito exclaimed. "My friend said before his mom got pregnant, his mom and dad always played this horror video game when they thought he was asleep. According to him, there's always lot's of weird noises and yelling coming from their room. He says that they are probably pretty bad at it because they always bang on the walls and jump on the bed when they lose. Amateurs."

"Oh…God…" Oishi muttered.

"It reminds me of what you two do when you think I'm sleeping." Kaito smirked.

"Oh dear God…" Oishi covered his face with his hands in embarrassment. This _wasn't_ happening.

"Kaito, I think you should go to your room now. Aren't you supposed to clean it today? I think you are." Oishi rambled nervously.

"Whatever." Kaito walked off, happy to not have to help with the dishes.

"I told you you're too loud, Eiji." Oishi whispered, pointing an accusing finger in Eiji's direction.

"Eh?! Kaito's only 4, how was I supposed to know he would pick up on something like that? Besides you're the one that's too loud." Eiji crossed his arms in defiance.

"Me?!" Oishi answered incredulously. Seriously, did Eiji not realize how loud he was when they 'played video games?'

"Just help me clear the table, Shuichiro." Eiji huffed. "And, by the way, your large round head is one of your best traits." Eiji added in a soft whisper.

Walking up to his room, Kaito smiled to himself in satisfaction. "Che, they are so naïve. Thinking I don't know about that kind of thing. Pfft. Dad, Daddy, of course I'm going to find out if you both are playing video games behind my back! Geez."

。。。

。。。


	4. Ich liebe Tennis

**I do not own The Prince of Tennis**

Fuji was still working at Cactus Photos Incorporated and Tezuka worked as Seigaku's German teacher and Tennis coach. Neither he nor Tezuka were willing to give up their jobs to stay home with Tanja full-time. However, Fuji was the boss of his own company, so he did whatever he wanted, including taking his new daughter into work.

Fuji walked into work one day carrying Tanja in one arm and a large camera bag in the other.

"Boss!" All of his underlings bowed deeply upon seeing his arrival. Then they all flocked over to help him carry various things to his office. What perfect little minions.

"Hey Boss, I didn't know you and your _wife_ were expecting a child." One employee said, noting the small baby Fuji was carrying.

 _Wife._ For some reason everyone assumes marriage is between a man and a woman unless stated otherwise, and upon hearing about his marriage, several of Fuji's employees had started thinking he had a wife. Fuji hadn't really bothered to correct them, because A. his personal life was none of his employees business and B. it was really funny to here them refer to Tezuka as his wife. [They didn't know they were talking about Tezuka…but still] But, they should have figured it out by now! Fuji had several photos of him and Tezuka on his desk, right next to his wooden engagement cactus. Plus, Tezuka came by at least once a week to visit Fuji at his office, and no girls, besides his sister and mother, ever came to visit him.

"Boss, come to think of it, I don't think we've ever met your wife." The same employee remarked.

As if on cue, Tezuka came ploughing through the office doors, somewhat in a hurry. He was carrying three separate bags of supplies for their child; diapers, toys, and food. "Syusuke, you left these in the car. Where do you want me to put them? I'm going to be late for work." Tezuka stated tersely.

The reality of the situation hit most of the employees. _Most_ of the employees.

"Who are you? Boss's nanny?" That same employee asked.

"No, Yamada, that's my so-called 'wife,' please help him carry those bags to my office. He has to go to work soon."

"Ah! Boss! I didn't know you were…" Yamada bowed deeply, apologizing profusely. Rushing over to Tezuka he bowed again and quickly gathered all of the bags of baby supplies "Boss's wife—err—I mean husband! I'm so sorry! I hope I didn't offend you!"

Two for one! Now his employees finally realized he had a husband not a wife, although Fuji was mildly disappointed they were not smart enough to come to that conclusion by themselves. Additionally, Fuji got the pleasure of seeing Yamada's precious little flustered face after coming to the realization that he had been referring to Fuji's husband as his wife for the past 7 months.

Fuji closed the office door behind him and looked at his child. To be honest, Tanja was kind of a weird kid. Not Kaito Oishimaru weird, but, nevertheless, not quite like other babies he'd met. She never seemed to cry, ever. For that matter she rarely laughed or smiled. She always had this same blank expression on her face. Unsurprisingly Tezuka didn't even seem to notice.

Just then Fuji had an idea. An idea Tezuka wouldn't like, but Tezuka wasn't here now was he?

"Yamada!" Fuji called out to the office

"Yes, boss!"

"Bring me some wasabi, please!" Normally Fuji would have gotten it himself, but now his hands were full with watching his daughter.

Yamada scurried off to grab Fuji's special wasabi from the office refrigerator. Upon returning asking, "But, boss it's barely 9:00am. Are you planning to have lunch already?"

"It's not for me, Yamada." Fuji explained. "Would you mind mixing a little bit of this in Tanja's food? Just a spoonful, not too much. It's her first time."

 _A spoonful is too much. Any amount is too much._ "Y-yes Boss. But boss, are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Wasabi is an acquired taste for most humans. We should start her early so she gets used to it sooner." Fuji reasoned.

"That will be all, thank you, Yamada" Fuji said, motioning for Yamada to leave his office.

After Yamada left, Fuji begun feeding Tanja the wasabi-baby food mixture. "This is wasabi, Tanja. Wa-sa-bi." Fuji smiled sweetly.

It was obvious she disliked it, not uncommon for a first timer, but Tanja still made no motion to cry. Tanja really reminded Fuji of Tezuka…Every time it's Fuji's turn to cook and he accidentally makes the food too spicy, Tezuka never complains. He even manages to finish all of his food, despite the fact that he hates spicy food. Fuji wondered if this is what Tezuka was like when he was a baby.

Because Fuji's heart is not made of ice, he eventually decided to switch to normal baby food. He figured Tanja would have plenty of time to develop a taste for wasabi as they had more father-daughter bonding time.

。。。。。。。。

Back at the Tezuka-Fuji house

。。。。。。。。

"Ich liebe Tennis" Fuji over heard Tezuka repeat for the umpteenth time. Tezuka was sitting on the floor of their cozy living room attempting to teach Tanja to talk. You don't 'teach' a baby to talk. It just happens naturally. But, no matter what he said, Tezuka just didn't listen and stubbornly kept pursuing his own ways.

"gaa…" Baby Tanja gurgled.

"Tennis" Tezuka annunciated slowly, pointing to his tennis racket.

"Mitsu, you can't force her to learn to talk." Fuji laughed with his small digital camera in hand.

"Auf Deutsch sprechen." _Speak in German_ Tezuka was very determined that their child be multi-lingual. He had designated certain times of the day for speaking every language; English in the morning, Japanese in the middle of the day, and German in the evenings.

Tezuka turned his attention back to their child. "Tennis." He spoke slowly and clearly.

" _Vati_ liebt Tennis" Fuji added. Vati, the German word for daddy, was the name the two decided Tanja would call Tezuka. It was much simpler and less confusing to have two distinct separate names for father, unlike Oishi and Eiji. Sometimes it was difficult to differentiate which one of his parents Kaito was referring to.

"Tennis ist wunderbar"

"Wu…wu…"Tanya's eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "Wa…wa-sa-bi"

"Prima! Fantastisch!" Fuji cried with glee. Oh yes, the results of Fuji's father daughter bonding time were paying off.

 _Syusuke…what exactly have you been doing with our child?_

。。。。。。。。

At the Oishimaru household

。。。。。。。。

"Oishi, thank you and Eiji for agreeing to watch Tanja for the weekend." Fuji said graciously as he handed his small daughter over to the shiny-headed man.

"It's no problem, really. You and Tezuka have been so helpful in looking after Kaito these past years, it's the least we could do" Oishi replied

"Oishi, here's Tanja's schedule." Tezuka said flatly, handing Oishi a small piece of paper.

"Schedule?" Oishi questioned, looking down at the slip of paper Tezuka handed to him.

 _Morning (7:00am-11:00am) practice English_

 _Afternoon (12:00pm – 4:00pm) practice Japanese_

 _Evening (5:00pm – 9:00pm) practice German_

"But, Tezuka! Eiji and I don't speak German!" Oishi exclaimed

"Ah. Just speak English with her half of the day and Japanese the second half of the day" Tezuka reasoned. They would do some extra German practice when Tanja returned home.

"Tezuka, Eiji's English is very…well…" Oishi started sheepishly. To be blunt, Eiji's English was terrible.

"Ah... You don't _have_ to." Tezuka said, his eyebrow twitched, in mild annoyance.

"Kunimitsu, I'm sure if Tanja goes one day without hearing German or English it won't ruin all the progress you've made." Fuji reasoned. Tezuka was really too enthusiastic about this tri-lingual thing.

"I'll do my best to speak some English with her, Tezuka!" Oishi said sincerely. That was if he could remember the English he learned in his high-school days.

"Also, I play tennis with Tanja everyday." Tezuka added, pulling out a small tennis racket.

"She can walk already?!" Oishi asked in shock. The girl was only 8 months old.

"She can't quite walk by herself yet, but Kunimitsu likes to go with the philosophy of 'the earlier the better'"

"I see…"

Upon seeing her tennis racket, Tanja said "Wasabi! Wasabi!" in delight.

 _Ha, Fuji's had a hand in teaching the girl to talk_ Oishi smiled in amusement

"No Tanja, Tennis! Tennis!" Tezuka emphasized.

。。。

。。。

Kaito was excited when his parents told him he would be getting a new sibling. After the baby arrived, he quickly realized how absolutely boring babies were. All they did was eat, poop, and cry. Everyday he asked his parents if the baby was old enough to play with him and everyday his parents gave him the same answer. _No, not quite yet, Kaito._ When he asked them if it would be alright to put the baby outside when she cried they told him to go to his room for time-out. He didn't really see why, _she_ was the problem here. _She_ was the one making the noise and annoying the living heck out of him.

This is why Kaito was completely annoyed when he heard his parents were looking after Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji's new baby for the weekend. Babies were stupid and he couldn't deal with having two of them in his house.

"Daddy! I don't wanna be in the same house as Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji's baby! Please, can I PLEASE stay over at Grandma and Grandpa's this weekend?" Kaito pleaded.

"Kaito, you haven't even met Tan-chan yet!" Kikumaru answered.

"I already know all about what babies are like. Stinky and loud." Kaito emphasized, hoping his daddy would listen to the voice of reason.

"Be kind, you were a baby once too you know. Your dad and I have decided that if your very very good this weekend we'll take you swimming and buy some of your favorite cucumber snacks. How does that sound?"

"I was never like that!" Kaito protested. "Wait? Swimming? Cucumber snacks? Okay, daddy! I'll be very good! I promise!"

"No hitting or pinching Tan-chan, alright!" Kikumaru warned

"Of course not daddy! Gosh, do you think I'm like still some little kid? I'm not 3 anymore." The 4 year old reassured.

。。。

。。。

Tanja was nothing like Kaito's little sister, Ami. Ami cried at everything. When she was hungry she cried, happy she cried, sad she cried. ALWAYS crying. But, Tanja was different. It seemed like Tanja never ever cried. For that matter Tanja never laughed either. She just kind of sat there.

When his parents weren't looking Kaito tried really hard to make Tanja cry. First he took away her prized tennis racket. That only made her say "wasabi!" How random. Next, when he was sure his dads weren't looking, he pinched her really hard. Then, he whispered to her that he thought tennis was stupid. Finally, out of options, he hit her.

"Oishimaru Kaito! What on earth do you think you're doing young man?" Oishi asked in his stern mother voice.

"Tanja's the dumbest baby I've ever seen! She doesn't do anything. I got bored." Kaito answered simply.

"You were bored, so you decided to HIT her? That doesn't seem to make a whole lot of sense now does it? Because of this incident, it seems we won't be going swimming this weekend."

"NO! Dad! You can't do this!" It wasn't fair! Tanja was the one being boring. Tanja was the one who practically forced him to hit her. It was all _her_ fault

"Instead we'll all be playing tennis this weekend" Oishi declared. They would have been playing tennis either way, but Kaito didn't have to know that.

"Noooo! I hate tennis! You know I hate tennis!" Kaito whined. Life just wasn't fair.

。。。

Notes:

I learned German a long time ago and have not actually spoken it in years. The grammar could be wrong, so feel free to correct anything. I tried to pick the words and phrases that were more similar to English, so it could be more readable to those that don't actually know any German.

Ich liebe Tennis = I love tennis

Wunderbar = Wonderful

Vati liebt Tennis = Daddy loves tennis

Prima, Fantastisch = Great, Fantastic


	5. Lovely Beach Time

**Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis and its characters belongs to Konomi Takeshi**

 _Knock knock_

 _Knock knock_

 _Knock knock_

It was Tuesday afternoon around 7:00pm. Fuji was trying unsuccessfully to concentrate on a last minute email for work, but an insistent knocking at the front door kept interrupting his thoughts. He was about to get up to open the door when he heard his now 7 year old daughter, Tanja greeting Kikumaru Eiji at the door.

"Tan-chan, are your parents home?" Kikumaru asked. Although, he knew the answer was yes. Tezuka wasn't the type to teach his daughter to answer the door if no one was home.

"Please come in. Vati is still at work, he should be home shortly. I think Daddy's in his office. I'll go find him for you."

So polite and cordial, everything his Kaito wasn't. Tezuka and Fuji would raise the world's perfect child, wouldn't they?

"Eiji, what brings you here? Please sit down, I'll make some tea." Fuji spoke from his in-home office doorway.

Eiji and Fuji sat at the kitchen table with cups of tea neatly in front of them. Tanja had since gone to her room to do her homework, politely leaving the two old friends to talk.

"So, what did you need to ask me?"

"Oh Fuji! I messed up big! You see, this weekend is a really important day for me and Oishi…"

"Your anniversary, right? Did you forget to get a gift? It's not too late, you still have a couple of days. I'll help you figure it out." Fuji spoke soothingly.

"No no. Worse than that. I err…his gift to me. I ruined it! He asked me if I wanted to go to the beach this weekend and I totally spaced that it was part of the anniversary thingy."

"And you got excited and told Kaito and Ami you were going to the beach." Fuji finished.

"Exactly! How did you know?!"

"It's a very Eiji thing to do."

"But, Shuichiro planned all of these romantic things for us to do together. We can't have the kids there!"

"So…you're asking us to babysit your kids?"

"Well I kinda already promised them we were going to the beach so…ehe…I'm asking if you and Tezuka and Tan-chan want to go to the beach too. And maybe meanwhile, you can just keep an eye on our kids. Please Fuji? That way we don't have to tell them they can't go to the beach, but Shuichiro and I can still have our romantic vacation! Win-win" Eiji made little V for victory sign with his hands.

Fuji took a long drawn out sip of his tea before speaking. "Eiji, you know I would love to go to the beach, the problem is convincing Kunimitsu. He's not exactly the biggest fan."

"Argh! Then help me think of something else, because even though Shuichiro says 'everything's okay' I know he's pretty annoyed with me right now." Kikumaru slumped down in defeat.

Just then Tezuka walked through the front door. He was carrying a brown paper bag, take-out, presumably their dinner.

"Huh? You should have told me you were having take-out tonight! I could have cooked you something! You guys eat take-out so often. It's not really healthy, Mr. Former Tennis Star." Kikumaru teased.

"Kikumaru…" Tezuka stared poignantly at his former teammate. He wasn't aware they would be having company today.

"We do try to cook sometimes, but seeing as both of us work full-time jobs, we don't have a lot of free energy. Plus, neither of us are exactly natural cooks." Fuji explained.

"Sorry, my mouth just says what it wants to sometimes. I should let you guys get to your dinner. But first, Tezuka how would you like to go to the beach this weekend?" Kikumaru asked hopefully.

"No thank you." Tezuka answered curtly, setting the bag of food on the table.

"Vati! You're home!" Tanja reappeared from her bedroom to greet her father.

"Tan-chan! How would you like to go to the beach this weekend? With Kaito and Ami?" Kikumaru asked expectantly. Kids love the beach.

"Well, I've never experienced the beach before. Uncle Kikumaru, does the beach have tennis perchance?" Tanja asked politely.

"Err… I don't…" Kikumaru began, scratching his head in slight confusion. _Tennis at the beach? Volleyball maybe. But, Tennis?_

"Eiji was just telling me about how the hotel at this beach just got brand new tennis courts. Both indoor and outdoor courts, Mitsu." Fuji added, looking up hopefully at his husband.

Tezuka liked the idea of new tennis courts. "Fine. I'll consider it." _That meant yes_

"Woo hoo! It'll be a big beach party!" Kikumaru cheered, jumping triumphantly in to the air.

。。。

Even though it was Oishi and Eiji's anniversary, Oishi insisted they all travel together in order to save the environment. The only car large enough for the seven of them was Eiji's catering van, which was painted a glowing neon red and had "Kikumaru Cheerful Catering Company" neatly written on the side. Since it was his car, Eiji drove with Oishi in the passenger's seat. Tezuka and Fuji sat in the middle row, and the kids squished in the back.

"This is so embarrassing…" The now 11 year old Kaito Oishimaru muttered. He did not want to be seen riding around in the obnoxious neon red van.

"Everyone, did you remember your tennis racquets?" Tezuka reminded as they were about to set off for the beach.

"Tennis racquets...?" Oishi questioned.

Kikumaru quickly used his hand to cover his husband's mouth. "Yeah, we got them." Luckily, he remembered to pack Kaito and Ami's racquets (even though Kaito wasn't the biggest fan of Tennis). That's probably how Tezuka would choose to entertain the children.

Upon arriving to their hotel Tezuka noticed it had a strange name. 'Ai Love You Hotel' "Syusuke, are you sure this is the correct location? The one with the new tennis courts?" Tezuka inquired.

"Yes! Ai Love You hotel has some of the best tennis courts around. Don't worry, Mitsu." Fuji reassured. Actually, he had no idea if the hotel had any tennis courts.

When the two couples both came up to the desk with 3 children under the age of 12, the secretary looked at them quizzically. This was a place for couples on romantic rendezvous, people on their honeymoons, not family vacations.

Seeing her stares, Oishi spoke up a little hesitantly "Hi, umm I have a room booked under Oishi." He handed her his ID and she began looking through the system to find his booking.

"5th floor, room 501"

"And, I have a room booked under Fuji" Fuji spoke up

"3rd floor, room 306. Have a nice vacation." The secretary tried to sound sincere.

Opening the door to room 306, Fuji noticed the faint smell of roses. The room had a small living room area, a kitchen, and a bedroom. It seemed like a normal hotel, except the living room had a hot tub right in the center.

"Syusuke, is this a love hotel? Did you bring our 7 year old daughter to a love hotel?!" Tezuka asked harshly.

"Hmm I don't know, judging by the hotel's name…"

"Don't be sarcastic with me. Are there even tennis courts?" Tezuka asked in annoyance.

But Tezuka's question went unanswered.

"Look! Tanja! Your room has a freakin' hot tub!" Fuji heard the ear-piercing shouts of Kaito Oishimaru.

"It is dangerous to have a hot tub in the middle of the living room." Tanja pointed out.

"Okay, we should head up to our room!" Oishi announced.

"Bye, Tanja" Ami waved, about to join her parents.

"Ah, Ami, actually all the kids are going to be staying with Uncle Tezuka and Uncle Fuji this weekend." Oishi explained.

"Sweet! This room is going to be the KID PALACE and I will be king." Kaito declared, very excited he got to stay in the room with a hot tub in the middle of the living room. He didn't realize that every room looked the same. His parent's room also had a hot tub in the exact same spot.

"Daddy! I'm going to miss you!" Ami's eyes filled with tears.

"Aww, sweetie, I'm gonna miss you too! We'll come visit you, don't worry! And, remember we're in room 501 if you need anything!" Kikumaru said, patting his young daughter on the head.

"Eiji…" Oishi sighed

"But, just if it's like some emergency! And, knock first!" Kikumaru quickly added.

Oishi and Eiji finally left to start their anniversary weekend. Kaito was now stripped down to the bathing suit he apparently had under his clothes the entire time, and he was relaxing casually in the living room hot tub. "Ami, dads just don't want us around so they can _do it_ "

"Do what?" Ami asked innocently.

"Who wants to go to the beach?" Fuji interrupted quickly.

"ME!" Kaito and Ami squealed.

"Vati said we would be playing tennis upon our immediate arrival" Tanja informed his dad.

"God, Tanja, nobody likes tennis." Kaito snorted. _What kind of lame-o wants to play tennis at the beach?_

"Everyone but you likes tennis, big brother!" Ami laughed.

"Since we came all the way here to the beach lets go to the beach first. Then if there's time we can go and play tennis later, okay?" Fuji suggested with his trademark smile.

Fuji watched in amusement as his daughter and husband both slumped down, reluctantly set down their tennis gear in a corner of the room, and went to get dressed for the beach.

。。。

Tezuka and Fuji sat back in two beach chairs they had brought from home watching the children play in the sand. The three children were working meticulously on building a sand mansion. Kaito's sand mansion to be exact.

"In the sand mansion, tennis is illegal and there is only swimming" Fuji heard Kaito explain as he dug a giant moat around the sand mansion.

Fuji glanced over his shoulder at Tezuka's watch. The children had been working on building a sand mansion for about 3 hours. Fuji wondered where they got the stamina to sit in the blazing sun for so long. It was hot, and he was tired. He glanced over to his right again and realized Tezuka had fallen asleep. _Heh, Kunimitsu, you're such an old man._ Fuji wordlessly pulled out his camera and snapped a photo of his sleeping husband.

Fuji then noticed he kind of had to pee. And, if he had to pee, the three children probably either had to pee 10 times more than he did or had already peed in the ocean. The later choice was disgusting and he knew his Tanja would never do it. That barbarian Kaito might have though.

Catching the attention of the children, Fuji announced he was going to the toilet. This was met with the expected cries of "I have to go too!" With all the children in tow, Fuji made his way to the toilet, leaving Tezuka asleep in his sandy beach chair.

Tezkua awoke only a couple of minutes later to find everyone gone. He was parched and the giant ocean in front of him wasn't helpful. Looking around Tezuka saw no sign of Fuji and the kids, only a giant 130cm tall (4ft ish) sand mansion and Fuji's precious camera bag and cactus book. He waited for 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes. Still no sign of Fuji and the three kids. Fuji would never go far without his dear camera bag, unless something happened! Fearing the worst, and also perhaps slightly dehydrated, he grabbed Fuji's expensive camera bag and began walking aimlessly around the beach.

"Tezuka? What are you doing?" He heard a familiar voice call out. Uh-oh.

"Oishi…I was" _I lost my husband and your kids._

"Ne, Why are you carrying Fuji's camera bag?" Kikumaru inquired, poking at the small little bag.

Just in the nick of time a pair of two more familiar voices could be heard. "Dad! Daddy!" The Oishimaru sibling chorused, both now carrying small bags of chips and other random snacks [Snacks they probably weren't allowed to have on Mr. overprotective Oishi's watch].

"Kunimitsu, what are you doing here? We went back to the sand mansion and you were gone." Fuji suddenly appeared behind Tezuka.

"Fuji, where did you go? I woke up and everyone was gone. I waited for you for over 15 minutes by the sand mansion."

"We all went to the toilet and then I thought we should get some snacks and drinks because the kids were hungry and you seemed kind of dehydrated. I guess it took a bit. Sorry if I worried you." Fuji said, handing Tezuka a much needed bottle of water.

"Drinks? Are you drinking in front of my children?" Oishi suddenly interrogated.

"Umm…I think he means water Shuichiro." Eiji laughed. Oishi was way to overprotective sometimes.

"Right…umm…we should get going" Oishi said, embarrassed. He just really likes playing the mother role, okay?

。。。

Kaito was distraught to find in his absence a large wave had come and destroyed the sand mansion.

"Nooooo, my hard work and determination!" Kaito screeched, covering his face with his hands in utter distress

"I need a drink." Fuji abruptly whispered to Tezuka.

"Here, have some of my water." Tezuka offered.

"No, Mitsu, an adult drink. I got a coupon for a free tequila sunset when I was waiting for the kids to come out of the bathroom."

"Syusuke! If Oishi finds out about this…" Tezuka warned.

"Don't let him find out then, okay?" Fuji winked [somehow, with his eyes still closed], walking off to retrieve his free tequila sunset.

Moments later Fuji reappeared with a half empty Tequila sunset in his hand. The tequila sunset wasn't strong, it was free after all, but Fuji didn't have a very high alcohol tolerance either.

"Mitsu…" Fuji slurred, edging up close to Tezukas face. "Let's put the hot tub to good use tonight, what do you say?"

Tezuka couldn't believe this. First Syusuke tricks him into coming on this 'vacation' by telling him there are amazing tennis courts [which still are yet to be seen]. Now, he's too tipsy to properly look after their own daughter, much less Oishi and Kikumaru's children.

"Your dad is sooo wasted." Kaito whispered to Tanja.

"He does that sometimes. My dads are under the impression I don't notice because I'm just a kid." Tanja replied.

"Kaito, Tanja, you will speak nothing of this to Oishi. Do you understand?" Tezuka spoke sharply. Everyone knew what the punishment was for disobedience. Laps.

A few more minutes passed. The rest of the Tequila sunset remained untouched, but Tezuka could tell Fuji was clearly out of it. Fuji was awkwardly rolling around in his beach chair, giggling softly to himself about who knows what. Sometimes enough is enough! Tezuka promptly stood up, grabbed Fuji's drink, and threw it in the ocean.

"My dad says it's not a good idea to throw things in the ocean. He says it's the fish's home, not a trashcan!" Ami yelled in alarm. Oishi would not be pleased to know Tezuka just littered!

Fuji's eyes shot open, staring intensely at Tezuka in anger. "Mitsuuu! That was for Yuuuuuuta! How could you?!"

"What? Your brother isn't even here, Syusuke." Tezuka pointed out rationally.

"I was gonna give it to him next time I saw him though. But, you threw it away! How careless!" Fuji spat.

Fuji was now going off about how Teuzka had thrown away his special present to Yuuta, which in itself is pretty weird. Was Fuji seriously planning on keeping that Tequila sunset until after they got back? On top of this, Ami looked like she could burst into tears at any second, because Tezuka had just 'littered in the ocean.' So, it would be an understatement to say Tezuka felt overwhelmed at this point.

"It's time to play tennis." Tezuka announced. He really couldn't take anymore beach time.

At Tezuka's words everyone began walking back to room 306 to grab their tennis gear. Fuji was still quite tipsy, so Tezuka insisted he stay in the room, rest, and drink some water. Tezuka already had the job of watching over 3 children, he couldn't deal with one more.

As he lay down on the big bed covered in rose petals, Fuji heard the door click shut. Fuji smiled in triumph, jumped up from the bed, and grabbed his cactus book. He made his way into the living room and found a comfortable space to read his book in peace. Finally he didn't have to spend another second with Kaito Oishimaru.

。。。

。。。

The Ai in 'Ai Love You hotel' is the pronunciation of the character for love [愛], which is sounds like the letter I. So together it sounds like 'I love you' hotel


End file.
